Daily Cow

2009

2008

2007

October
September
August
July
June
May
April
March
February
January
Another Soviet-style fixed election just around the corner.
Oct 1st
“It doesn’t matter what McCain says. The polls may all...”
— Thrash Cardiom
Oct 1st
Among the finer things said during the bailout debate:...
Oct 1st
Sep 30th
It’s what’s for dinner!
Sep 30th
Dice Illusion, dice baseball, fun, fun, fun…
Sep 29th
Won last game of the season. Had overpowering stuff. Will be...
Sep 29th
Farewell, Shea Stadium. Thanks for all the great memories...
Sep 28th
Fucked everything up.
Sep 28th

ACChief

Who prints the money for this bailout? The Federal Reserve? Alright, so the Fed prints all this...
Sep 28th
“Breakthrough in the financial bailout bill in Congress. Get...”
— Drew
Sep 28th
The broke borrowing from the broke.
Sep 27th
It’s Caturday!
Sep 27th
Still saddens me. Miss you John and George.
Sep 27th
“Don’t you get the idea I’m one of these goddam...”
— Al Capone
Sep 27th
May I take your order?
Sep 27th
“Life is one long process of getting tired.”
— Samuel Butler
Sep 27th
A foolish person this Donald Trump. His casinos can’t...
Sep 27th
“I think there are innumerable gods. What we on earth call...”
— William Burroughs
Sep 27th
Post It Power Alert!
Sep 27th
“There was a young lady named Bright, Whose speed was far...”
— Arthur Buller
Sep 27th
Sep 27th
“An atheist is man who has no invisible means of support.”
— John Buchan
Sep 27th
Twinkie Post Alert!
Sep 27th
Hugs and Kisses!
Sep 27th
“Man masters nature not by force but by understanding. This...”
— Jacob Bronowski
Sep 27th
Sep 26th
“Tax the Churches. Tax the Businesses Owned by the Churches.”
— Frank Zappa
Sep 26th
Sep 26th
Sep 26th
Sep 26th
Sep 26th
“Time sneaks up on you like a windshield on a bug,”
— John Lithgow
Sep 26th
Sep 25th

Speaking In Tongs

Couric: “But he's been in Congress for 26 years. He's been chairman of the powerful Commerce Committee. And he has almost always sided with less regulation -- not more.”
Palin: “He's also known as a maverick though. Taking shots from his own party, and certainly taking shots from the other party. …”
Couric: “I'm just going to ask one more time, not to belabor the point -- specific example in his 26 years of pushing for more regulation.”
Palin: “I'll try to find you some, and I'll bring them to you.”
Sep 25th
Sep 25th

Go Home McBush!

Well, it turns out John’s 64.1% missed votes during the current Congress is almost an all-time...
Sep 25th
Beauty abounds!
Sep 24th
“All life we work but work is a bore If life is for living...”
— Ray Davies
Sep 24th
Sep 24th
Sep 24th

It's A Hard Life

Most men have erections every hour to hour and a half during sleep. Most people’s bodies and minds...
Sep 24th
Abe Vigoda. New Poster Boy For Birth Control!
Sep 24th

Intercourse Leads To Overpopulation...

On any given day, sexual intercourse takes place 120 million times on earth. Humans are a quickly...
Sep 24th
I now work on Shirelles Boulevard!
Sep 24th
Diamond and her morning sun!
Sep 24th
Sep 24th
Sep 24th
“Software is like sex: it’s better when it’s free.”
— Linus Torvalds
Sep 24th
Sep 22nd

Stadium Memories

What a Sunday! I guess my top Yankee Stadium memory is: 1) Chris (t) Chambliss hitting the HR...
Sep 22nd
Take a few billion from him first!
Sep 21st

Expensive Market (Free)

Let’s not call National Health Care socialized medicine anymore. We now see how fast the...
Sep 21st
Lack of run support led to loss. Pitched well in next to...
Sep 21st
Sep 20th
It is now Caturday, September 20th, 2008
Sep 20th
Sep 20th

Is This What You Want?

Routine can be good. You can quickly finish a task without thinking much about it. But routine...
Sep 20th
Sep 20th
“Entertainment is a worse drug than heroin. It makes people...”
— Nick Tosches
Sep 20th
Sep 20th
“The so-called American dream has not lived through these...”
— Nick Tosches
Sep 20th
What’s something in your room that would surprise your...
Sep 19th
Sep 19th
“Stocks sharply higher on news that enough vaseline is...”
— Drew
Sep 19th
Sep 16th
Sep 16th
Sep 16th
Sep 16th
“Philosophy is a game with objectives and no rules....”
— Unknown
Sep 16th
Sep 15th
“Who are you and who am I To say we know the reason why?...”
— Richard Wright (Pink Floyd)
Sep 15th
Wave after wave of undulated joy!
Sep 15th
Excellent pitching effort. Had a one hit shutout until the...
Sep 15th
Sep 14th
Sep 14th
Sep 14th
Sep 14th

Jesus Christ vs. Charles Darwin

Jesus Christ Positives: Impressive stamina. Historically known for taking a beating, staying on his...
Sep 14th
Happy Caturday!
Sep 13th
Sep 13th

21st Century Commandments

Do not do to others what you would not want them to do to you. In all things, strive to cause no...
Sep 13th
Sep 13th
“I will say, then, that I am not, nor ever have been, in...”
— Abraham Lincoln in 1858 debate...
Sep 13th
Obama: Tell me John, what made you choose Sarah Palin over...
Sep 13th
Sep 11th
Sep 11th
Sep 11th
And still Bin-Laden is free. And we are about to elect...
Sep 11th
Late rally by offense kept me from a loss. Three double...
Sep 11th
Sep 10th
Sep 10th
Sep 8th

The Odds Are Even

A 55-year-old man who smokes is as likely to die in the next 10 years as a 65-year-old who has never...
Sep 8th
Sep 7th

Christian Pickup Lines

If you Deuteronomy, I’ll Deuteronomoyou. Uhhh, baby you’re not on your period are you?...
Sep 7th
Sep 7th
We don’t need no ejucation!
Sep 7th
I abstain, your honor!
Sep 7th
Things are getting ugly. Politics as usual in NJ.
Sep 7th
Sep 7th

COWLEONE'S CHERRY BUSTED!

CHICOWGO-Cherry Cowleone, thirteen year old daughter of Bossy Leader Donna Cowleone, was placed in a...
Sep 7th
A complete game 8 hitter with no walks. Good run support and...
Sep 7th
Sep 6th

New Day, New Affliction

Da' News Media: "Counting calories, nutrients and fat grams is practically a national pastime."
LoneVWolf: No; it's something practiced by a select few nitwits with nothing better to do. The rest of us eat whatever happens to be available and get off our asses to walk around every now and then. You think the Native Americans worried about how much fat free range venison has in it? The fuedal Japanese about the carb content of their rice staple diet? They ate what they had and didn't sit on a couch vegetating for 9 hours a day.
/Sick of this drivel... when is someone going to name the malady which causes vapid windbags to sound off with the latest "terrible affliction to strike at the very heart of humanity" when there's no missing white girls in the news?
Sep 6th
Sep 6th

I Don't Know, I'll Alaska!

“So Sambo beat the bitch!” This is how Republican Vice Presidential nominee Sarah Palin described...
Sep 6th
New Republican VP candidate vetted yet again.
Sep 6th
McCain’s real message to Americans. (Same as...
Sep 6th
McCain begins onshore drilling in Alaska.
Sep 6th
“Do not go gentle into that good night, Old age should burn...”
— Dylan Thomas
Sep 6th
Sep 6th
“A hippie is someone who talks like Tarzan, looks like Jane,...”
— Pat Buttram
Sep 6th
Sep 5th

Nothing To Say

Sep 5th
Sep 4th
“If you take the game of life seriously, if you take your...”
— Timothy Leary
Sep 4th
Sep 4th
Take two. Ok…
Sep 4th
I got blisters on my fingers!!!
Sep 4th
You cannot undo what has been done (in life). You cannot use...
Sep 4th
PosTits #69
Sep 4th
Smoking is good for you. Repeat. Smoking is good for you.
Sep 4th
“Masturbation: the primary sexual activity of mankind. In the...”
— George Szell
Sep 4th
At work with no windows, no Twinkies, no pay raise for three...
Sep 4th
Sep 3rd

Politics Is Bullshit

When we submit to politics, we are submitting to their bullshit. We are allowing them to have the...
Sep 3rd
Sep 3rd

Ramdom Musings

The rainwater collection movement is taking the country by storm. Let’s not be fooled by this...
Sep 3rd
Sep 2nd

Rejected International Sports Teams...

1. Brussels Sprouts 2. Cannes Openers 3. Amsterdam Yankees 4. Vienna Sausages 5. Belgium Wafflers 6....
Sep 2nd
Sep 2nd

Font Fun

A font walks into a bar. The bartender says “Hey, we don’t serve your type...
Sep 2nd
Sep 1st

Books Read Sept. 2008

Oryx & Crake - Margaret Atwood RL’s Dream - Walter Mosley Even The Stars Look...
Sep 1st